who was that bitch that answered your phone 5 months ago?!

Recently i attended a formal dance/dinner thing. (yes: i am in seventh grade, no: i did not spike the punch) i wanted something simple and sleek. i originally bought a different dress, only to exchange it a month later for this one, that looks almost exactly like it except for the neck line and the criss-cross in the back.

i love it. it's from bebe and it's one of those things that makes you feel glamorous as soon as you put it on. i wear it sometimes to watch law and order and it adds a little happiness to the pedophiles and rapists. Afterall, if you can't get dressed up for good tv, than what have we to live for? (besides the inevitable alien invasion)

that's not how you play marbles. no, but that's how you keep them.

For about the past year, i've been obsessed with the idea of getting a mohawk type cut. However, my fear of committment to a hairstyle i tend to consider limiting, and possibly too edgy for the "hoochie in me," has kept me from getting it. Here are some attempts at a similar style, without the permanent cut.

Don't you give me no lip. Who do you love?

Speaking of dazzling celeb style then, I want to give some props to this girl Rihanna. I am completely enamored of her wardrobe. Check it out:

I love love love her color palette. She rocks those latex-like leggings with an ease that makes me forget about seeing them on every other young celeb. She's does so right with the hats- an accessory I still struggle with. She's always got on fucking amazing shoes and Hmm! I love old grampa looks, like in the above middle pic.

Her makeup is great and I so appreciate that she plays around with some retro looks and gets all fun with her hair. The last pic above, with her pageboy hat, little vest and high waisted pants, received some bad flack on a few sites, but I think it illustrates well her adorable little doll appeal. I've become so smitten with her closet, that I even find myself loving outfits that I normally would never have thought twice about before. Like, for the love of god, this contraption:


Well, alright. Maybe I would hold off on flowery, flowy, gauzy pantsuit. Yet if it were in all blacks and grays...

that's what i do, i drop truth bombs

it's about time i made some claims as to people who i think have neat-o fasion. my first person of interest: lindsay lohan. i was surprised to discover recently that i actually think she has a pretty sick fashion sense; acting credentials and sobriety tests aside. let's take a look shall we, and then we'll calculate her neat-o factor.

sparkly, mettallic, party dress: awesome (x=1)
black, wayfarer sunglasses: awesome (y=1)
hippie, flower headband thingy: awesome (z=1)
large print big tunic things: awesome (a=1)
gold and black Jay-z sneakers: awesome (b=1)
bulky homemade-looking scarf: awesome (c=1)
leggins/tights: awesome (d=1)

fake tan: bearable (m=0)
fake blonde hair: bearable (n=0)
occaisional nipple flash: bearable (p=0)

now in order to calculated her neat-o factor we simply plug in our made up variables into the neat-o equation.

x+y+z+a+b+c+d+m+n+p= f(neato)
1+1+1+1+1+1+1+0+0+0= 7

and there you have it. neat-o factor of +7. amazing.

Summer Conflictions

Summer comes and makes me want to buy summer things, like linen, or florals, or bright summer colors, or gauzy light garments. Which would be fine, if it didn't go against every other atom in my being. I use to end up with a warm weather wardrobe that I would never wear, UNTIL I finally came to the realization that I am just happier wearing mostly black all year round. Yes, perhaps slightly more heat absorbing than the other summer-residing people around me, but whatever. Anyway, accessories are so non-committal and still let me indulge in the fun. So far this year's warm weather has manifested itself in these two purses:



I've been living out of the yellow tote nonstop recently and love it. Sometimes when it's super hot though, it sticks to my arm and when I peel it away I am reminded of Kraft singles. That's ok though. I can just hold it far away from my body and still admire that blinding yellow.

ya, suck it, I do read the paper

If there is one particular trait that sets my style apart from my sisters' style, it has to be the hoochie in me. The hoochie in me loves short shorts, push up bras and stiletto heels, just not all at once.

I love them. They are Guess by Marciano and I am planning on wearing them tonight, tomorrow, and maybe forever.
P.S. more on the hoochie in me to come.

Another Day Another Cut

New!

before

My friend Jules had an interview at a hair salon and needed a model to prove her hair cutting abilities. So she proposed an idea for a glam buttrock/mullet/asymmetrical cut thing. It took me a week debating whether or not I should let her take my hair that I had been growing out for a year. BUT, common it's hair! It'll grow back! 

10,000 hits like this to keep me rich, ok bitch

So I've been wanting to buy some simpler tops. Trying to pull the whole casual/nottryingtoohard/michaelstarsads thing. So I bought this simple black V neck t shirt from some random store called Tilly's that I only went into because I was with a guy who was looking for Metal Militia shirts (I know right).

I have bought plenty of plain t shirts in the past, but they are always too thin, too thick, get stretched too easily, too tight, too big, too short (i.e. middle school midriff), too low cut, and the only really good ones are too expensive ($36 Guess). I bought this one without even trying it on because it was only $8 and now I'm hooked. It is amazing. I just bought 3 more online. I am a believer and you should be too.